“What makes me a better person”


2013-12-Black-Background-8I opened my eyes. It was dark. I didn’t know where I was. It was like infinite void, emptiness, nothingness, darkness in all directions. A man appeared. He looked, odd, unusual, and embodying power. He spoke sweetly to me “so it seems you have another chance, but this is your last one.” I stared at him in silence. I thought are you real, is this a dream? No this isn’t a dream, he replied. Well it must be a dream because how can you hear what I am thinking? He said to me that here, thoughts and spoken words are one, they are not separated. Where is here? I said. “You have a choice to make, so you can say that is here, and this regards your future.”

Ok. This whole situation seemed as real to me as anything. Perhaps this is what dreams and this reality have in common. So what are my choices?

You can have a life with the following.

  1. A woman by your side.
  2. A PHD, with a 6-figure career.
  3. A fully furnished home.
  4. Friends that adore you.
  5. Family members that adore you.
  6. Wealth
  7. Fame


Or, you can have the answers/knowledge of who you are, and I will guide you on how to achieve that to the best of my abilities.

What does that even mean? I said. Achieve what? What will you help me with? And do you really mean I receive all of these things, or do I pick just one of the seven?

Yes, you have only 2 choices, a life with the things above, or with this second option about who you are.

How much time do I have to decide? I asked.

Not long, you should choose as quickly as possible. He replied.

A moment passed in silence.

I asked, How did you know I wanted these things?

He only stared at me in silence.

He asked me what my choice is.

Within myself I found something interesting. I was curious, and I wouldn’t call it morality, but I just knew I had to.

“what makes me a better person” I said to myself.

Explain yourself, he said.

I said: That is how I feel with each of these 7 things. I feel better as a person, or believe I a better somehow, as who I am. And that is why you asked me the second question, or option, which is about who I am.

Very good, he said.

I said: and you can’t give me something that I already have, and simply need to give myself, the answer. These things don’t make me a better person, but I accepted and allowed myself to live the lie that they do.

Well, enjoy your life! He said to me.

Thanks, I said.

Boulders of Life Potential

Pushing a boulder up the hillMax opened his eyes. He looked around and he saw he was in a deep valley. There were boulders around, and people carrying boulders up the sides of the valley. Max spoke to one of the people nearby. She explained that these boulders are your potential lives. You can pick and choose a boulder to take up out of the valley to live your life. Max walked around looking at the boulders. They were of varying sizes. He thought to himself that it must be easier to get out of the valley with the smaller boulder. He went out to see the other people. Throughout the day he watched and conversed with the people. He learned that even with the smallest boulders few ever get out or leave the valley. And something else he noticed. Everyone chose the smallest boulders. He asked them, why do you choose the smallest boulders. They said in response, “you know why, just ask your mind.” And they were right because he previously thought that it was easier to carry one of the smaller boulders. Yet despite that it was easy to take one of the smaller boulders, few ever succeeded in reaching the top.

Max looked at this situation. Well, what if my thoughts were wrong? Maybe I shouldn’t be taking the smallest boulders. That is when Max saw inscriptions or writings on the boulders themselves. He hadn’t seen this before, and when he showed them to the others, they couldn’t see them. Max knew what the inscriptions said, even before he read them. He knew he had to take the largest boulder out of the valley.

This is where our story ends, because in knowing Max’s decision, we know the ending/result. Whether Max succeeded or failed didn’t matter, because he would try again. He kept trying until he succeeded. Because he knew he was doing something of value. He didn’t simply accept his first thought or reaction, but he dared to question and look at what is here, and his real options. And it wasn’t the boulder that gave him a better life. It was himself, in building his strength, resolve and perseverance. When he left the valley, he was the strongest of them all, and he used that strength of who he is, to create the best life, not only for himself, but for others as well. The largest boulder said: Do What Is Best For All.

Complaining Ben

house-on-the-hillOn a hill, in a house, lived Ben. Everyday Ben would go to the market to purchase some goods for the house. The venders of the marketplace knew Ben well. They were always prepared to expect Ben to… well, complain. At every stall in the market Ben would find something to complain about. Sometimes it was the lighting on the fruits, other times the temperature within the stall. So this was Ben’s life everyday.

One day, in one morning right before Ben was to head out he saw a letter under his door. “Someone must have left it this morning” thought Ben. He opened it and read it. Apparently his niece Michelle was in town and wanted to meet him at the yogurt stand at noon.

At noon, Ben and Michelle met, they exchange greetings, sat and talked a bit about what’s going on in their lives, and they started to walk around the stalls to buy their needed groceries and products. At the lamp stand, Ben complained that all the lights were too dull. At the toy store, Ben complained that all the toys were too old fashioned. At the piano stand, Ben complained that none sounded rich enough for him. Michelle caught whiff of a pattern here.

She said: “do you always complain about everything?” “What do you mean?” asked Ben. “Well it seems that you are always able to find something to complain about.” “Well, what’s wrong about that, I am just appraising things for what they are.” Michelle stood in silence for a moment. “Look Ben, I see it’s cool to appraise things, but how often do you actually complain about things?” “I still don’t know what you mean” said Ben. “Okay, let’s drop it then for now.”

So Ben and Michelle continued their shopping, and talked about other things. Ben still complained at every single stand. Michelle didn’t let this bother her, she was more concerned than anything about how this is affecting Ben’s life. She decided to give him some time, since he has to see the consequences himself.

It turns out that over the next years, much didn’t change for Ben. Michelle however saw how Ben’s complaining spread and grew into personal attacks, to people around him. Ben became more and more reclusive. Michelle on the other hand learned something important. That whether someone complained or not, could be someone’s emotional state spilling out, as she observed in herself. She decided then to not go into other’s  game of complaining but rather simply do and act in ways that are good for her. So if someone were to complain about some object, good, or service, Michelle would investigate and see for herself whether she actually enjoyed or found that product useful for her, instead of simply going with whatever came up in someone else. And through time, Michelle realized something interesting that she would like to share. That her very thoughts were like complaining thoughts. Meaning that when you complain, there is a thought that comes up with you, and you can either choose to accept and allow that complaining thought, and therefore treat it as if its real. So it’s no different than when someone in your reality complains. You can either choose to accept and allow it within you, as who you are, and whether you agree to and thus assimilate that complaint.

Michelle did wonder whether Ben would ever realize what he is doing to himself. But when she asked him, he didn’t even recognize what he was doing. She identified then this important point. That how you respond to questions, determine your future. Do you complain? And how you answer such questions determine your future. How much do you care about you? How far would you go for yourself? You see, what Michelle pointed out, is quite true.